Wednesday, August 7, 2013

I Would Work For...

So it's Wednesday,  I know you are all sitting around doing NOTHING but waiting for me to link up with E, Myself, and I for midweek confessions...but actually, I'm throwing out a curveball and linking up with Erin at Living in Yellow this week for "I would work for..."  Basically if WMC ran out of money (seriously, it's a private school...this is totally possible) what reimbursement would have me coming in day after day without a paycheck...and honestly, this is pretty much a confessional anyway...

1. The "accidental" death of Sallie Mae.  Seriously, she's a witch with a capital B.  Before you freak out on me, of course I'm not trying to order a hit on anyone...I'm Dominican, not Sicilian!  And seriously, she's not a person...she's the ginormous corporation that feels the need to constantly remind me every. single. month. that I got my education degree from a private college...and for some reason she feels like I need to pay her back in full...ugh. I hate her...and if any of you Sicilians out there know how to get rid of her...seriously, hook a girl up.

2. A laundry folder/bathroom cleaner.  This is usually Kaitlyn's job, but since she's off nannying this week (and making enough money to get Sallie off my back, might I add), my laundry is just sitting in the basket getting wrinkles.  I don't know what it is about folding laundry that I can't handle...seriously, I could just pop in front of Honey Boo Boo for an hour and get those babies folded up...but I. just. can't.   My Dominican mom doesn't understand this..."You need a nice lady like my Crucita, to come in and take care of your house for you."  Yes mom, I do, but THIS IS AMERICA, and if Crucita were working here pretty soon INS would show up, and pretty much that's why I have a teenage daughter instead.

This basket of laundry has been sitting in the basement for a FULL WEEK.
 3. Non-curly hair.  I realize that I've previously discussed the misconceptions surrounding curly hair (it has so much's so must wake up with beachy waves) but seriously, I'm about sick of the messy bun that I have been wearing for the past 6 months, and I'm even more sick of looking like Mufasa every time I take it down.  I remember the good old days when Sarah Frego and I would stay up until 2 in the morning giving her a Clairol home perm (and to be honest, I'm not sure that was even a great choice back in the 80s) but seriously, curly hair is not for the faint of heart...or for me.  Give me a lifetime supply of Brazilian blowouts and I will give you a lifetime of devotion in return.

4. Vera Bradley.  Not the bags, the woman.  No, I'm just kidding, the bags (is there actually a woman named Vera Bradley?? Totally researching that after I finish writing this).  So, I'm not really a florally type of person...I'm kind of like clean lines, solid colors...I'm not even shabby chic...I'm more like Pottery Barn...which is why I can't quite figure out my obsession with Vera bags - they're a bit old lady-y and that in itself makes me cringe...I'm not even 40 yet, people!! The crazy thing is that  I LOOOOVE my school bag, and my hipster, and my phone case, and I would totally not be opposed to adding ipad case and wallet to that list.  This presents a problem because SALLIE MAE keeps getting in my way of investing everything I have into a Vera-printed luggage set...I hate her!  I would draw the line at Vera PJ's though...floral school bag = good, floral nightgown = Chris would KILL ME.

Christmas 2012...Thanks, Mom!
And Finally,

5. I think it's completely safe to acknowledge that I would totally work for selfish ambition and vain conceit.  Seriously...get me ahead in life? I'm there.  Which is apparently not an acceptable reason to work (Phil 2:3, NIV) and therefore I have pretty much decided that working without pay is probably not on my radar. I'll stick to a paycheck, give Sallie her monthly "Thank you for giving me the money to eventually get myself a job in order to pay you back" check in the mail, hug my daughter as she folds the laundry, and continue adding Vera bags to my Christmas wishlist.  That being said, the next time my mom comes to the States for a visit, she better as heck bring Crucita with her!! For real!!

Lots of Small Town Love,


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  2. Just stopped over from Living In Yellow! I would totally love to get rid of Sallie Mae and Nelnet. Seriously. They steal my money every month.

    1. Thanks for stopping by! I'll take out Nelnet if you take out Sallie Mae - it'll be a double hit ;)

  3. Hey Jenn, I hear ya on the student loans front... I'm in grad school and cringe every semester when I have to take out more money. But the degree is totally worth it right???!?! :)

    1. That's what they tell me :/ Best of luck in grad school!!